Free to a good (?) home

I have so much blogging to catch up on. New recipes (low cal ones), gardening and even a bit of sewing but after a particularly trying night last night and with my arms in yet another sink of dirty dishes, for a moment I let my mind wander onto how I would write a freecycle ad for my kids. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love them but today, I would happily palm them off on whichever stranger turned up first…….So, here goes:

Free: Little girls.
Comes in three sizes, would suit a variety of households. Can be taken together or separately. For further information on each model, please see descriptions below.IMG_0505

Model 1 – Large

This is the original O’D model and is now almost 6.5yrs old. If you are new to little girls, this is probably the model for you. It has some useful functions installed such as reading, writing, speech and can make own cereal. This particular model is kind and can be helpful if shouted at sufficiently. The downsides are incessant whining and a tendency to burst into tears over trivial things such as ‘there’s a piece of courgette on my plate’. Likes chocolate and back tickles. Does not like courgette. Model 1 works well with both model 2 and 3.

Model 2 – Medium

This is a slightly newer model with less functions installed. While it can talk and dress itself, this model is incapable of helping or putting anything away. This model comes with a unique and endearing sense of style, however the model malfunctions severely when it’s ‘style’ is tampered with. This model falls over a lot and has modelled it’s whining function on model number 1’s. Likes dressing up and meat. Does not like anything it liked the day before. Model 2 works well with model 1 but tries to kill model 3.

Model 3 – Small

This is the latest model. It is insanely cute but lacking in a number of basic functions such as walking, talking and self-feeding. This model requires any new owner to perform most tasks for it although functions can be installed over time. The latest function ‘clapping’ was installed today. This model is probably only suitable for someone who has experience of little girls as it is anyone’s guess what will stop the crying / whining. A good supply of Petit Filou should keep this model fairly happy. Model 3 adores models 1 and 2 but eats their stuff.

Collection only.

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